True but thats because hes a fetus.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize
