I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
are you so shy because you have an std?
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Randomize
