is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
