lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
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