you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
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