So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
