Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize
