Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
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