Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
