Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Randomize
