I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
We need to get me chipped asap
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
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