You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
