Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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