I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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