My brain says no but my pants say off.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize
