he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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