Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
