this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
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