my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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