I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
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