so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
