the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
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