come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
