i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
