He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
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