Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Randomize
