Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Randomize
