i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize
