he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
I love you.
Bad choice
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