Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Randomize
