think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Randomize
