This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Randomize
