Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
Randomize