I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
