I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Randomize
