remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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