So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Randomize
