Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
North Korea, Best Korea!
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Randomize
