i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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