Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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