Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize
