He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize