On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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