RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
