I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Randomize
