Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Randomize
