I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Randomize
