She is in my trunk
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Randomize
