I want to stick my p in your. b.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
me + whiskey = a bad person
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
