yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
