youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
