Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
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